Fear of fear

I am a passenger...So I'm walking down the road...It brings me to some beautiful things and to some ugly ones too..
Well...That's the part of the game..

Well fill my lungs full of smoke,
Fill my belly full of beer,
Fill my nights with bad jokes,
Told by folk full of fear,
Fill my eyes with a stinging,
Fill my time with wishing she was here,

Fill my wide with a narrow,
Fill my safe full of danger,
Fill my bed full of shadows,
Fill my dreams full of strangers,
Fill my ears with a ringing,
Fill my heart with a fear of fear,

Well fill my cup half empty cause its never been half full,
Fill me up paint me over like a damp patch on the wall,
Leave me lying on my stomach on your neighbour's bathroom floor,
I'm only here until tomorrow any way,
I'm burning up like a fever that rages in the night,
Spark me up I'm a firework I'll burst in to light,
For it's better to burn out than to fade out of sight,
That's what someone told me any way,

So fill my lungs full of smoke,
Fill my belly full of beer,
Fill my nose full of cocaine,
Fill my eyes full of tears,
Fill my short with a longing,
Fill my time with wishing I wasn't here,

Oh fill my past with regret,
Wrap my present in brown paper,
Fill my future with promises that promise to come later,
Fill my heart with a stinging,
Fill my heart with a fear of fear.

Keeping Our Perspective

One of my clients recently told me of a situation at her office. She had just completed her third year with her organization. She had received exemplary annual reviews every previous year. She made a mistake a few weeks earlier that caused the company to lose money, and she was reprimanded harshly. Her supervisor said they were watching her closely.

My client felt hurt, angry, and disappointed. How could her three years of exemplary service be so quickly forgotten over one mistake? Her needs for respect, consideration, value and understanding were not met in this situation.

Don’t we all want this, really? Don’t we all want to be valued in our totality, to be loved even when we make mistakes? Wouldn’t we also like to offer this to ourselves?

Compassion is about seeing the humanness in everyone, including ourselves. One way to express compassion is to remember your entire relationship with someone, rather than focusing on one disappointing incident.

*Be aware of opportunities today to connect to the history of love you feel for someone in your life even if the present situation is painful.*

_(This reflection is an excerpt from  Peaceful Living: Daily Meditations for Living with Love, Healing, and Compassion by Mary Mackenzie)_

The long road

"The Long Road"

You've walked a long road and you've worn it well
You stitched yourself up when you fell
Keep your memories in jars
Carry secrets in scars
Beneath your shell

You've seen some good days, and some bad ones too
You weave through fashion and trend
You've seen a sun rise on an ocean blue
You've seen it set for the dearest of friends

You found faith but you, chose to doubt it
You found love but you, left without it
And now you don't want, to talk about it

You travelled down through foreign lands
Touched mountain tops and golden sand
Seen pyramids and temples made of stone
Keep seashells in a cashmere scarf
A treasured book of photographs
In every single one you stand alone

You've seen Vienna and the Berlin wall
As you watched the decades fall
The letters that you wrote never made it home
Your birthdays flew past like June
With Christmas days in hotel rooms
And new years eve with people you don't know

You built friendships but they, sailed without you
You never meant it and that's why, they doubt you
And they don't ever talk about you

You're older than you used to be
The mirror weaves a tapestry
Of lines that dance and shimmer 'round your eyes
You stare back at a man, forever holding out his hand
As if the answer's going to fall out of the sky

But the penny never dropped
And no man has ever stopped time from flying by