Who am i

"Who Am I To Stand In Your Way"

Forgive me
I may have said things
That aren't exactly
The way that I feel

I told you I'd be strong
I said that I moved on
But it doesn't take long
To realize

That I'm not over you

But if there is anything that makes you feel happy
Tends to your heart in the ways I'd been lacking
Then who am I, who am I to stand in your way
To stand in your way
To stand in your way
I won't stand in your way

I know it sounds crazy
But I need you to trust me
If it's how it must be
Then I'll fade away

When it finally feels true
Then do what you have to
Cause I'd never blame you
For not choosing me

But I'm not over you

But if there is anything that makes you feel happy
Tends to your heart in the ways I've been lacking
Then who am I, who am I to stand in your way
That I feel is no longer your burden
If there is anything that can make you feel perfect
Then who am I who am I to stand in your way
To stand in your way
To stand in your way
I won't Stand in your way

Down the road someone will ask me if I know you
I'll pause for a moment, I'll smile and say that I used to

If there is anything that makes you feel happy
Tends to your heart
The ways I've been lacking
Then who am, I who am I to stand in your way
That I feel is no longer your burden
If there is something that make you feel perfect
Then who am I who am I to stand in your way
To stand in your way
To stand in your way
I won't Stand in your way
I won't Stand in your way
I won't Stand in your way

Here as i sit alone

There's this feeling of sitting alone and thinking of the moments we've been together happy, no fear of hardships.
Here I am sitting with people but lonely...had no idea before that I may have to sit like this ...
It's a still water lake but ripples all around ... Too many fish.
It's the same place (Mansar lake-J&K) where I have been with jose and tijo...I miss them too...

Listening to this song called "for the last time" by Jack Savoretti and it gives me the feeling of loneliness.  Waters give me the feeling of me being small and the huge thing in front of me. People coming here and going.
You're not speaking to me these days and you can understand very well how will I be... inside.
We'll be moving away from this place now...going to board the train back to delhi.

You know it..!

Have never been away from you? No..! Because you know me so well. Whatever I've been what I am now, all this... everything that has changed me from then till now. All that we have gone through...all that has tried to separate us, everything. My strengths and weaknesses in different times, including the sickness and my mood...all...! You know me so well that I can't even think of sneaking away from you.
My situation when I'm without and my cheerfulness when I'm with you...my sorrowful moments when you're not speaking to me and my joy when you enjoy me talking to you.
You know it naa...!
I'll do anything that it takes to see you...be it anywhere, any place, any cost...you know it naa...!
I'm impulsive and restless at times but you matter to me...you know it naa!

I'm perfect with my imperfections and I know it...but I love you mo2...you know it naa!

I can't imagine myself without you because you complete me ...you know it naa!
तुझे दुख दे के एक पल भी चैन से नहीं रहा हूँ मैं कभी भी...you know it naa!
If you don't forgive me and get back I'll die in this guilt only...the guilt that I couldn't even imagine that I'll go through...you know it naa..!
एक बार आ तो जा वापस और फिर देख तूने कैसा तराशा है मुझे...!

https://play.google.com/music/m/Tvwnsxqagxewdommioxinoerxmu?t=Kiss_This_Love_Goodbye_-_James_Blunt

I dont wanna change u

https://play.google.com/music/m/Txgzibqt57mj5jwn5lreacrz2wm?t=I_Don_t_Want_To_Change_You_-_Damien_Rice

I m the greatest bastard that u know

https://play.google.com/music/m/T75axkwyyibk3jnbm5qv2e3rrmu?t=The_Greatest_Bastard_-_Damien_Rice

...और कुछ नाकामयाब सी कोशिशें मेरी ...the other side of it...

कोशिश तो की थी कि जीत लुंगा हर किसम के दौरान, मगर ये कोशिश ही थी मेरी बस।
की है मगर...

उम्मीद तो की है कि जो भी हो, जाने नहीं दूंगा तुझे कहीं भी...पर अगर तू खु़द ही चले जाना चाहे...मेरी कोशिशों के बावजूद, तो तुझे ज़बरदसती रोकना भी तो ग़लत होगा ना..
किया मैंने ऐसा भी...

कोई कितना भी कोशिश कर ले, तेरे ख़याल तक जुदा नहीं कर पाता... उम्मीद है इसका ईल्म तो होगा तुझे।

...तो कुछ ऐसी हैं नाकाम कोशिशें मेरी...जो शायद का़मयाब रहें कि मैं इक भरोसेमंद इन्सान बन जाऊं तेरी ज़िंदगी का...
बस ऐसा ना हो कि शायद कभी ईतनी भी जान ना बचे कि कोशिश कर ना सकूं...
अभी तो है...